My Story: I m a 54 year old woman who has three children. I had postpartum depression with all three children but my middle and third child was the worst. I think because I returned home in two days after their births. I didn't get much help either.
I tried breastfeeding my son the middle child. I'd never breastfeed before and he never got enough to eat, never slept and my breasts were full and never got pumped. I never could relax and I couldn't even eat a proper meal.
It was summer and I had no air conditioning. I was bad. I looked like hell and I would leave the house and go out and sit on the swing set while my son cried and cried and cried. Then I'd cry. I suffered alone is what was bad. I called my doctor and got my son started on formula and stopped breastfeeding. My nipples were cracked and bleeding and I couldn't take the pain.
I guess I got through it but at the time didn't think I would.
My third child a daughter was totally the opposite but one day at a family dinner I was breastfeeding her back in a bedroom in tears while everyone else was visiting and eating. Again no one helped me and I remember it just all built up and I started crying. After I fed my daughter I packed everything up and just left right out the door crying and walking away with my baby.
I left my husband, son and older daughter at the family dinner and said nothing. Just walked home. My mother in law came after me and asked why I was leaving. I was sobbing. She told me she had been depressed too when she had her babies.
It's really hard. It's a big change in your life and you just aren't prepared for it. If you are lucky to have someone help assist you that is a blessing. I didn't have that. I looked like hell, was so tired with no sleep and had a bad diet for a while that made things worse. I remember slapping peanut butter on a slice of bread and eating that daily because I didn't have time to prepare meals. My breasts both were the size of footballs. LOL!
Now my kids have all grown and moved away and have their own families.My advice is to ASK for help from family or friends.
Anonymous | Missouri