My Story: I was unbelievably strong in that moment even though I was at my visibly weakest.

My Story: My postpartum depression started on my discharge day from the hospital. I was a first time mom of two baby boys that went home childless. My twins had to stay in the NICU. I felt alone, robbed, empty and guilty for feeling all these things instead of grateful.

I will never forget recovering at my parents' house because it was closer to the hospital. I was worried about who was going to take me to see the babies everyday. Ten thousand worries and I felt not in control of anything. I was holding everything inside and just started crying.

My parents were trying to find out what was wrong, trying to steer me out of the gloom, but I was in too deep. YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE - I shouted. You don't know what it feels like to give birth to your babies but not have them in your arms! You don't know what this feels like...

I will never forget those emotions, the enormity of it on my heart. I was unbelievably strong in that moment even though I was at my visibly weakest.

I am a mom- this is real and I got through it.

Anonymous | Frederick, MD


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Posted on September 18, 2015 and filed under Postpartum Stories.